I’ll say it straight up: You may not like what you are about to see. It is confronting. And if you have had an eating disorder or do have one, I would, in fact, advise you not to watch the video.
When I watched it, it brought back memories of what I saw when I checked myself into a clinic at age 18. I had a fairly moderate eating disorder in terms of duration and expression in comparison to a lot of girls, women, boys and men I met there. The lengths they went to to express their feelings by punishing their bodies were horrific. The denial perhaps even more so. I’m not sure I could’ve ever put my body through what they were doing at times. I would have rather ceased to be than starve myself to truly skeletal size, eat cottonwooll or mutilate my own body. Those are desperate cries for help.
The reason I am putting this video up today is that I’m not sure anyone who hasn’t had an addiction can really comprehend how twisted and warped your perception of reality can become when you are in the throes of it. It’s an out-of-body experience and a violation of your own humanity.
This video shows what an eating disorder can truly be like and the impact it has without sensationalising too much or judging. Apart from the very intro, I thought it was an open and honest account that deals with the issue well and could be a great resource to educate. Of course, it doesn’t show the despair I have witnessed in others, nor the utter helplessness of those that are eventually admitted to hospital and yet are still trying to starve themselves. Those whose pain is so great they choose a slow death by self mutilation via starvation and/ or purging.